Sex after abdominal diseases

Written by Dr David Delvin, GP and family planning specialist and Christine Webber, psychotherapist and lifecoach


Do abdominal diseases affect your sex life?

Yes, they certainly do! Almost all of the diseases which occur in the abdomen can affect a couple's sex life. This is because symptoms such as pain, soreness, burning, discharge and bleeding may cause discomfort during sexual intercourse.

The very thought of having an abdominal disorder can also psychologically affect your sex life and reduce your sex drive. When trying to make love, you may find it difficult to switch off and relax.

After having an operation on your abdomen you might experience after-effects that make you uncomfortable.

For instance, the area that has been ‘cut’ may feel strange and painful for several months. So even if the rest of your body is healthy and working normally, your desire for sex may be low. This means that at first you may not be able to have sexual intercourse or feel the kind of pleasure you used to.

It is also important to realise that in some major abdominal operations the nerve supply to the genital area may possibly be cut through. If you are going to have lower abdominal surgery, do discuss this possibility beforehand with the surgeon.

The very thought of having such a disease can also psychologically affect your sex life and reduce your sex drive. When trying to make love, you may find it difficult to switch off and relax.

How do you recommence your sex life?

It is important that you talk to your partner about your low sex drive and also let them know when desire returns. If you don’t tell them, they have no way of knowing how you feel or what you are capable of doing.

If you say nothing, your partner may initiate sex before you feel ready. In such a case, it's likely you'll either refuse or agree through a sense of duty. Either way, sex may not go very well.

On the other hand, your partner may be overly hesitant about initiating sex through consideration for your feelings. He or she may assume you don't feel like it and you, in turn may conclude that your partner has lost interest in you. Consequently, nothing happens and neither of you knows how the other is really feeling.

What to do after pelvic inflammatory disease (PID)

It can be difficult for women to resume their sex life after having a bout of pelvic inflammatory disease PID. They may feel discomfort for months or believe that the infection has returned. During this time, any attempt to have sexual intercourse is likely to run into trouble.. However, most women will eventually feel like returning to sex.

Talk to your partner about it. Find a time when you are both in the mood and begin by kissing and caressing. Then you can very gradually progress to loveplay.

Don't move on to sexual intercourse before you are completely ready. In other words, you should feel like making love – and in addition, your vagina should also feel moist enough for your partner to enter you easily.

If there is pain or discomfort, do not attempt further penetration but continue your lovemaking with sexual stimulation that does not involve intercourse.